Codependency and Narcissism in a Relationship

Codependency and Narcissism in a Relationship

This is from Ross Rosenberg’s seminar entitled: Emotional Manipulators and Codependents: Understanding the Attraction.  In this clip, Ross describes why Codependents and Emotional Manipulators (NPD’s, BPD’s, ASPD’s and Addicts) are always attracted to each other.  Ross introduces a dance metaphor to describe the power of these dysfunctional relationships.

The seminar inspired his new book: The Human Magnet Syndrome: Why We Love People Who Hurt Us.  Emotional Manipulators, Codependents and Dysfunctional Relationships.  The book will be available in early March.

  • Learn Why Emotional Manipulators and Codependents are Drawn Together
  • Understand the Binding Nature of These Relationships
  • Understand the Complex Origin of Emotional Manipulation and Codependency

Emotional manipulators and codependents are perpetually and inevitably drawn to each other. The attraction dynamic is so strong that both partners pursue each other despite therapeutic interventions, multiple failed relationships and painful consequences. This seminar investigates the relationship dynamic that irresistibly draws emotional manipulators (Borderline, Narcissistic and Antisocial Personality Disorders) and Codependents together.

Using a unique, fresh and innovative approach, Ross Rosenberg will explain the fundamentals of this attraction dynamic. He will describe the nature of these binding and lasting relationships, which are often immune to personal or professional assistance. Ross will introduce his “Continuum of Self” model, which ties together the complex web of underlying psychological forces that inescapably draws the emotional manipulators and codependent into enduring and mutually inescapable relationships. You will explore why these two personality types exist in an intense, fluid and self-correcting system that creates an enduring magnetic attraction.

You will also learn why these opposite personality types create a destructive, lasting and ultimately pathological relationship. Ross will describe in detail symptoms and traits of Codependency and Emotional Manipulators (Narcissistic, Borderline and Antisocial Personality Disorders). Most importantly, you will learn how to help codependent victims recognize their own propensity to be attracted to emotional manipulators. Therapy approaches will be briefly discussed. With an understanding of this “magnetic” relationship force, psychotherapeutic efforts can be more focused and effective. At the end of the day, you will leave with a deeper understanding about these destructive relationships.


Behind the Mask of the Manipulators

  • Who are these manipulators?
  • Why do they have so much power?
  • An examination of emotional manipulatorsAntisocial Personality Disorder
    • Borderline Personality Disorder
    • Narcissistic Personality Disorder
      • Subtypes of NPD

Who are the Codependents?

  • Why do people who sacrifice and love unconditionally get hurt get so badly?
  • Traits of codependency

The “Dysfunctional Relationship Dance”

  • Opposite personality types are natural “dance partners”
  • Why these two remain together
  • Why this dance is destructive and inevitable

Manipulators and codependents are human magnets

  • The attraction dynamic has magnetic properties
  • “Human Magnets” are irresistibly pulled together
  • Is it possible to break free from the dysfunctional force?

The Continuum of Self (COS) Explanation

  • A new way to measure self within relationships
  • Codependents and Emotional Manipulators are on opposite sides of a continuum
  • Dysfunctional opposites are inversely attracted to each other
  • The relationship attraction is understood with simple math
  • Explains the natural balance between opposites
  • Why the attraction dynamic is definitive and repeatable

Family Systems and the Continuum of Self Concept

  • Why dysfunctional relationships resist change
  • When stable is not good
  • Families are controlled by their thermostat
  • Why equilibrium is king

Continuum of Self and Love & Romance Addictions

  • Emotional Manipulators and Codependents may be love addicted

Why Addictions and Personality disorders seem the same but are not

  • The importance of differential diagnosis

The Etiology of the Emotional Manipulative Disorders and of Codependency

  • Can the Codependents and Manipulators Change?
  • Can the patterns be broken?
  • What is the prognosis?


  • Identify and diagnose emotionally manipulative individuals (Borderline, Narcissistic and Antisocial Personality Disorders).
  • Identify and diagnose codependent clientele.
  • Demonstrate the complex relationship dynamic occurring between emotional manipulators and codependents.
  • Explain the working definition of the Continuum of Self model.
  • Outline how to integrate the Continuum of Self model into a therapy practice.
  • Recognize the etiology of Emotionally Manipulative-related Personality Disorders.
  • Recognize the etiology of codependency.


Ross A. Rosenberg, M.Ed., LCPC, CADC is the owner of Clinical Care Consultants – a counseling center in the northern suburbs of Chicago. For over 20 years, Ross has been a psychotherapist, administrator, and professional trainer in the mental health, social service and/or child welfare fields. As an expert in the codependency/co-addiction and addiction field, especially sex and Internet addiction, Ross provides comprehensive counseling, training and consultation services. His professional trainings span the topic areas of sex and internet addictions, codependency, narcissism and borderline personality disorders, attention deficit disorder and the clinical implications of technological advances. As a psychotherapist, Ross specializes in the fields of substance abuse, addictions, codependency / co-addictions, Attention Deficit Disorder, challenging teens and trauma resolution. Ross’s counseling / psychotherapy style has been described as solution focused, analytical, and educational while also being warm, intuitive, healing, spiritual, and compassionate. According to Ross, “for every problem, there is a solution; and within a warm and respectful therapeutic relationship lies the power to overcome the most seemingly overwhelming obstacles.”

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The Human Magnet Syndrome: Why We Love People Who Hurt Us. Emotional Manipulators, Codependents and Dysfunctional Relationships

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